As I have wandered around the book stores this time of year, I continually see those annoyingly robust books that read "100 Things to Do Before You Die", or better yet, "1000 Places to Visit Prior to Your Expiration Date". Well, I decided to create my own far simpler list of vastly more affordable items for a better bucket list. My items are not only easier on the money belt, but simple to accomplish, and still touch on that irresistible urge to travel and explore our world . Here are "50 Mindblowingly Easy Things to Accomplish Before You Die". Let me know how you score, particularly if it is higher than 30%.
1. Ride an elephant. If India is too far to journey for this, attend the annual pet expo and pay $10 for a five minute ride.
2. Eat so much of one thing that you feel unable to walk, stand or sit comfortably.
3. Buy a bottle of Chianti, a prosciutto ham and some melon. Rent the Italian Job and wear your sunglasses while watching the movie.
4. Learn to say one key travel phrase in five languages, preferably "I'll take ten of those and mail them to this address."
5. Fly to Amsterdam and order an opiate off the lunch menu of a sidewalk cafe.
6. Ask strangers on the street what day of the week it is and then offer to take their photograph.
7. While in Barcelona, insist that you thought you were eating in a topless bar, not a "tapas" bar. Become so annoyed that you leave before paying the bill.
8. Buy a beret in Paris and stubbornly never stop wearing it, even in summer.
9. Take off your shoes and socks while visiting a local fountain. Wade in and sing La Vie En Rose softly to avoid attention.
10. Take a cruise to nowhere from Norfolk, VA. Gamble once you've reached international waters and return home the next day.
11. Eat several tablespoons of raw brownie batter.
12. Write a poem. Any haiku will do.
13. Drink tonic water with lime at a Christmas party. Act increasingly inebriated as the evening wears on.
14. While online, participate in an unsavory chatroom.
15. When a stranger asks you to take her photo, photograph her cleavage only using the zoom option. Thank her when you return the camera.
16. Pretend to recognize the person in the adjacent seat on an airplane as a long lost high school classmate.
17. Try not to laugh when someone's umbrella is blown inside out during a torrential storm.
18. Eat at least one chocolate covered insect while visiting a foreign market.
19. Carry uneaten bread with you to feed random ducks encountered during your day.
20. Purchase travel books at Barnes & Noble for five different countries explaining to the sales clerk that you have a very busy week planned.
21. Wear rubber galoshes on a hot, dry day.
22. Celebrate New Year's Eve in Florence, Italy. At midnight, greet everyone you see by saying "Banana" instead of "Bon Anno".
23. Wear unattractive, but comfortable walking shoes intended for the opposite sex on your next trip.
24. While exploring a new city with your camera, go somewhat out of your way to photograph someone who is hot.
25. Order a Star Wars robot from the Sky Mall magazine on the airplane.
26. Photograph someone's bottom.
27. Order a special meal whenever you fly always trying out various ethnic menus.
28. Forget to pack underwear for your next trip.
29. Eat out at a very fancy French restaurant and carefully photograph each course before consuming it.
30. On your next plane ride, take a copy of the Kama Sutra as reading material. Make note of other passenger's reactions.
31. Offer nametags to everyone getting on an elevator.
32. Play with a calculator in a restaurant until it spells "Hello" upside down.
33. Purchase vintage clothing impulsively.
34. Wear Leprechaun socks while travelling.
35. While using a computer in a hotel lobby, send random responses to people in the contact list of the previous person using the computer, who left his email open.
36. Fly to London and dye your hair blue at a beauty salon.
37. Ask fellow passengers if they want to join the mile high club, while winking at members of the same sex.
38. Watch a sunset from a gondola, after the gondolier has gone home for the day.
39. Buy expensive perfume from the duty free list on an international flight, then spray yourself heavily before disembarking the plane.
40. Eavesdrop on conversations at expensive restaurants. Contribute to the conversation at appropriate intervals.
41. Order five desserts at a pastry shop in Paris and eat them all at once while people are watching.
42. Choose an ordinary object such as a doorknob on a house and take 50 photographs of it from every angle until others begin photographing it too.
43. Wear 3 D glasses instead of sunglasses while riding a public bus.
44. Wear a color that is not in your own personal color palette.
45. While in a restaurant, insist on ordering an entree that is not on the menu.
46. Use airsickness bags for lunch bags.
47. Offer unsolicited fashion advice to others while shopping in a foreign country.
48. Disinfect all chairs before sitting in them.
49. Sit uncomfortably close to an unknown person on a park bench.
50. Hire a taxi. When the driver asks where you want to go, say "To infinity and beyond."
And your score is????
Down, down, down. Would the fall never come to an end! `I wonder how many miles I've fallen by this time?' she said aloud. `I must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth. Let me see: that would be four thousand miles down, I think--' (for, you see, Alice had learnt several things of this sort in her lessons in the schoolroom, and though this was not a very good opportunity for showing off her knowledge, as there was no one to listen to her, still it was good practice to say it over) `--yes, that's about the right distance--but then I wonder what Latitude or Longitude I've got to?' (Alice had no idea what Latitude was, or Longitude either, but thought they were nice grand words to say.)